Previously on the Brains/Black Widow Story: Erhardt became the Generation 6 heir and brought home his wife from college, Shellie. Other people and spares moved out. Erhardt wants to be a mad scientist (of course) and his face is astonishingly lumpy.
Collectively, the Brains family has killed at least half a dozen people by now, and their relative Deborah the Black Widow has bumped off an equal number. They're fitting right in with Circle Pines' long history of serial killers terrorizing the town. Will anything stop their reign of terror?
Gen 5 heir Clayton (also The Law of Circle Pines) and his wife Lanika (the Evil Mayor of Circle Pines)
Gen 6 heir Erhardt (mad-scientist-to-be) and his wife Shellie (innocent bystander)
Gen 4 spare Torgo, who's survived quite a lot at this point and still has about thirty years to go as an elder
This episode features special effects too expensive to show! And a super secret random challenge!
With Clayton, Lanika and Torgo all being elders, this household is a little top-heavy. Torgo isn't allowed to get a job (from the "Moocher" challenge aaaages ago), and they don't need any more money, but Clayton and Lanika keep their jobs because otherwise they're just hanging around the house all day. (I miss that from Sims 3, how you could tell them to go somewhere and they'd hang out at the park or a restaurant while you puttered around the sim-house.)
Erhardt starts the week with a complete makeover. He has a very difficult face to work with, if you read the last couple of episodes, so we need to hide the odd bone structure and strange protrusions. Long hair and a full beard should do the trick.
And if you're going to do that, you might as well go all-out. Let's Get Funkified!!!
Erhardt and Shellie are expecting their first child, by the way. Shellie wants to send three kids to college, and why not. This is Generation 7 gestating, I might as well use up the names on the list!
All the elders have at least another week ahead of them, maybe more. If there were a mess of toddlers to care for, that would be one thing, but the household is stagnating.
Also, I want to point out that Torgo has been around since Generation 4, and he and Clayton still aren't friends. Clayton is a good-natured soul, despite his penchant for turning a blind eye to his wife's murderous schemes and enacting dubious laws. I don't know why Torgo won't be friends with him.
Torgo took up jogging while he was a zombie (before he became an elder) and he now goes for a run every day.
"Whoof! Where'd you get those clothes? The Austin Powers catalog?"
Erhardt still doesn't have his Mad Scientist job, but he hit platinum a while back. The only reason I'm doing it is to get him out of the house and out from underfoot. (Yes, I could cheat him into it, but that feels unfair. He can just worry about getting a job like the rest of us! Unlike the rest of us, the household has six figures in cash, so it's not an emergency for him.)
"Yep, I got a good thing goin'."
"No, Deborah, I'm only aiming for three, and those all with the same father. *cough*tramp*"
Clayton and Torgo head out on the town one night. The most interesting result of which is...
"It's me? What?"
"GASP! You're right, Edna! It IS him!"
"What are you people talking about?"
"Of course, sir, we won't disclose that we saw you here or know anything at all! You can trust us!"
"I can trust you're all nuttier than a Stuckey's log."
"Oh, teehee! You're such a wit!"
Also, Statesman the Vampire (founder of the Service Sim Legacy) picks on the town slob.
MEANWHILE, BACK HOME
Shellie and Erhardt celebrate the arrival of their firstborn, a girl named Flavia. I tweaked Erhardt's genetics too, so those *((&&^ black eyes wouldn't be so dominant, and Flavia takes a lot after her mother's coloration, with black hair and blue eyes. Going to have a lot of black haired babies in Generation 7, I suspect. But it's a change of pace after a few generations of blonds and redheads.
I'm not sure who Lanika thinks she can reunite. Most marriages around here end with the untimely death of a spouse, not a divorce.
Could it be she's tiring of terrorizing the tiny town? She's been at it for an awfully long time.
At least Shellie is probably safe for a while, given she's the bearer of grandchildren.
Oh, like that matters to the Brains. Though I wonder: someone has the guts to stand up and fine him? He's The Law! Maybe Clayton's losing his grip on the situation as well.
Look at Torgo, ruling over the meal. Nothing like being a wet blanket!
Torgo has a general dislike of just about everyone. Doesn't matter what the situation is. Maybe he was born to be a crotchety old man.
Hey! A rare picture of him smiling! "This is a damn fine sandwich. Perked me right up."
I know, I know, I could have Shellie the Family Sim make up some soup, but eh. The Brains probably see it as survival of the fittest.
I feel for you, Clayton. I really do. This has been a bad season for coughs.
They want 3 kids but I'm not bothering with perks like "better chance of twins", because it makes everything almost too easy. Even if it does mean the kid years really drag out. :/
I... which service sims are these? Who does he even talk to? I wasn't aware he'd ever even given Remington the time of day.
Jeez, give even MORE money to the Brains. :/
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA okay, that's just funny XD
Shellie is not actually on good terms with her in-laws. Not hate, either. They're roommates, not family. Besides, there are some unsavory rumors about these people.
Lanika blasts Flavia's eardrum, while Clayton forgot the tune.
Oh yikes. Flavia has Shellie's hair and eyes, all right, but those are Erhardt's cheeks, no two ways about it.
In a change of pace from the usual way my simtoddlers learn things, Flavia gets the nursery rhyme first.
Just an awkward closeup of Erhardt and his facial coverup. It looks good on him, though I keep thinking of those little lap dogs, the ones with the black eyes. Can't remember the breed, but they've got fuzzy faces and, you know, like the one selling Cesar brand dog food?
"Torgo? You okay up there?"
"Yeah, just bonked my head trying to make the bed."
"Seems kind of empty here with everyone moved out except us. I like it."
"Torgo, you nut! If you hated being here with everyone, why didn't you move out on your own?"
"It seemed safer to stay here. Also, free food."
After this they're finally friends!
Let's look at Flavia from another angle... nope, still big cheeks.
At last, Erhardt gets a job as a science teacher! He also teaches shop class, because knowing which wire goes where is an important factor in mad science, and it's fun to invent things. Science!
More time passes and I took some more pix that I'm not using because I don't remember why I took them.
Wow, Torgo. Took you long enough. Just a general, "eh, maybe a date might be fun, it's something to do" sort of want.
Everyone jog! (the other thing I do to get them out of the house)
Then I realized Shellie is a college student, it says she graduated, she has a sheepskin to prove it, but only the standard 4 wants. So I batboxed her the extra wants. It's only fair. You get those just for graduating, not based on GPA.
"Look, I'm not ssssure there'ssss really anything wrong with burying bodiessss in the back yard. No need to make a fussss about it."
Famous last words, Lanika.
Erhardt's shop class all works together to outfit a roadster with a death ray that barely clears the garage door.
Torgo is not amused. "A death ray? Really? In our house? Are you insane?"
"It's not illegal! Yet. And anyway, I built it for peaceful purposes only."
"Peaceful purposes only? You're kidding me. There isn't any such function for a death ray. It's in the name! DEATH!"
"But I tell you, it can be used for good!"
"I'd love to know exactly what 'good' you think a death ray will do. You're going to end up in jail or worse, and even your parents won't be able to bail you out. Get that thing out of the house."
Erhardt quietly agrees and goes to the garage. "Dumb stupid sort-of-grandpa-uncle... man, there's a lot of buttons on this thing. I should've had the kids label which was which."
"That wall, I didn't realize it'sss ssso empty. I sssshould get some art - "
Please note the direct line of fire of the death ray through the house:
"OH MY G*D! OH MY G*D! WHAT HAPPENED HERE?!"
Death notes that this probably invalidates the warranty on the fridge.
Aragog Spyder (one of Deborah the Black Widow's boys, he's a Brains grand-nephew or something) came over just in time to catch the awful event. "Another dead body! This is why I'm running away to Nepal!"
"I know who caused this! It's Erhardt and his 'peaceful' death ray!"
"That wasn't the ignition button. Let me try - Yow! This thing is really loud!"
"Erhardt! Wherever you are, I will find you and kill you myself!"
YOU GUYS ARE WORKING ME TO MYSELF.
"Erhardt Weinstein Brains! Stop whatever it is you're doing this instant! You are so grounded!"
"Oh, man, that thing burned a hole in the garage wall! Dad's gonna be pissed. Oops, that button really shouldn't be right at knee height!"
"So help me, son, I'll - "
"I - I'm comin', Lisbeth!"
Erhardt finally decides to get out of the murdermobile and see what the damage is. "NO!" he sobs. "I intended it for peaceful purposes only!"
SON, EVEN FOR A BRAINS, THIS TAKES THE CAKE. YOUR MOTHER WOULD PROBABLY BE PROUD IF SHE KNEW WHAT HIT HER.
HEY, CAN I GET A SELFIE WITH YOU? I'M GOING TO POST THIS ON DEADJOURNAL.
Shellie is less than pleased to wake up from her nap to discover holes in the walls, a burning refrigerator and piles of ash on the floor. "What the hell were you doing?"
"What makes you think I did it?
"I can't believe you, Erhardt! You killed your own parents? And your... great grunkle?"
"Shellie, baby, we're going to be okay. This has been happening for a couple of generations now, family members killing each other off. I swear this is the last time, because this was an accident and not my fault, in a way I haven't quite figured out yet."
"Tell you what, let's pack everything up real fast, and go house hunting! And it's just a shame that this one might burn down while we're gone!"
"That just might work!"
Still, these people aren't *that* fast, so it's good the fire doesn't take over too much. Shellie has her second baby almost immediately thereafter, a black-haired, blue-eyed boy named Cambot.
Then Erhardt quickly scans the real estate section...
...and Flavia is potty trained just in time to move to the new house.
Almost everything is left behind to be consumed by the flames (they hope, to hide the evidence) and the Brains move into a house so huge it can't all fit on the screen at once.
Well! I suppose karma came back to some of the Brains in a big way. Let's hope Erhardt learned an important lesson about tampering in God's domain!
"Yeah, label the buttons."
Will Cambot have the same lumpy face? Does this mean the end of the curse hanging over Circle Pines? TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR MORE GREAT BRAINS ACTION!
~ ~ ~
And now, a few words.
First - the house didn't burn down, of course. Sim houses don't seem to be that flammable. Erhardt, Shellie and the kids did all move out and sell almost everything, and spent the money on the biggest lot I had in inventory. It came furnished, too! Sweet!
Second - I just couldn't face two to three weeks of elders cluttering up the house. Which leads to:
Third - The challenge I initially rolled was "kill off the next 3 visitors/walkbys". Which is actually too easy. I let the household run for a few days and then browsed the list of Season Six episode titles to pick one for this episode. Danger!! Death Ray grabbed my attention, it's got a great first half and, of course, the phrase "for peaceful purposes only".
Back to Second - so I decided on accidental death-raying to wipe out 3 of the family, namely, the three elders, and also to score some cinematic payback for Lanika the Murderous Mayor and Clayton her accomplice. Sorry, Torgo, you were collateral damage.
Fourth - in keeping with the grand MST3K tradition of cheap special effects, I give you: cheap special effects!
Fifth - I did record the deaths, then exited without saving, went back in, and had the three elders all die peaceably of premature old age so they got nice tombstones. The graves all got sent to a cemetery, because I was moving the family and I've lost tombstones out of people's inventories before. Otherwise they could've hung around and made people miserable, but let's face it, that's going on already in the Black Widow household, and Shellie isn't a copycat.